The Baby Bean Blog

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Giving In to Pink

I've been opposed to pink right from the beginning. I insisted on completely neutral outfits for Ella. At first, it was pretty easy. Since we didn't know her gender from ultrasound, people who bought us things prior to her birth had no choice but to go neutral. After her birth, anyone who asked us what we wanted or what size she was were told unequivocally that I wanted nothing pink. For the most part, people went along with what I asked. Those who did not ask us what we wanted, without fail, gave us something entirely pink. Those items were never used.

I don't know what, exactly, I was doing. I guess it had to do with labeling Ella a "little girl." I don't mean that in the sense that she was small and female. I mean all that society imposes--that she be sweet, and quiet, and nice, and clean in her frilly, perfect dresses. Actually, I wasn't so much trying to avoid the things she "should be" as I was trying to make sure she could be all the things that a "little girl" should not be: brave, loud, boisterous, strong, and dirty. I wanted her to have all the options.

So there was no pink, and there were no girly things period. Then, on the day my partner adopted Ella, I decided to go ahead and put her in a dress that my partner's cousin had given her. A denim dress with little dogs embroidered on it. It was a dress, but it wasn't pink. So I put her in it, and when I did, I couldn't believe how cute she looked. She was my little girl, in all the best ways those two words together can mean.

And since that time, slowly, very slowly, girlier things started to enter her wardrobe. Not too much. I still overwhelmingly bought gender-neutral things, at this point largely because I saw every purchase as not just Ella's, but also Little Two's, and since we couldn't find out his/her gender, that meant buying neutral. But still, a few girly things entered the wardrobe. And then, a few pink girly things entered the wardrobe. And I had to admit that Ella looked cute in those pink things.

Well, as of yesterday, I think the campaign against pink is officially over. We decided to get a new carseat for her. We got the Britax Marathon. Not only did we get the Marathon, but we got the Marathon in pink with little flowers. That's right. PINK WITH LITTLE FLOWERS. I could have gotten green, or gray, or something else very neutral. But I didn't. I got this:



What can I say? It's over. Pink wins.

2 Comments:

  • I think I understand how you feel about labeling Ella as "girl" in the sense of all those things society says it should mean. I've tried really hard with my boys to break gender stereotypes. Boys can own dolls and girls can shoot guns. Everyone farts. :)

    But honestly, I don't know how you held out so long on the girly stuff. Little girl outfits are sooooo cute! Everytime I see a pink jumper with bunnies in a newborn size, I have a strong urge to buy it.

    By Blogger Whimsy Chick, at 1:04 AM, May 29, 2006  

  • My friend who have a boy had decided not to buy him any clothes that had either A) a military theme (like camouflage) or B) a sports theme. Well, they've hung tight on the military thing, but they had to give into the sports stuff. It's just impossible to avoid! Obviously, the same is true of girl clothing. Almost ALL of Ella's "neutral" clothing comes from the boys section. Girls clothing has to be, for some reason, VERY obviously female. Newborn stuff wasn't so hard to get pretty neutral, as many people don't know what the gender of their baby is, but as Ella gets older--now into 12-18 month clothes--it's harder and harder not to buy something that is either GIRL or BOY.

    By the way, maybe you will be buying that jumper one of these days, eh?

    By Blogger Oz, at 5:54 PM, May 31, 2006  

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